Was It Worth It

Was It Worth It

Was it worth it?
That ill-begotten, grabbed gain,
Really, was it worth the pain?
A moment of pleasure, toward buried treasure
But: taken not earned, a life upturned
Following an urge, primitive, reptilian
A million reasons to say no, and yet
Just one yes that wouldn’t let you go
Mind flicks, a light switch,
Conscience sticks around
Only long enough to express
Momentary, parental regret
At the absence of thought implicated
In what is yet a decision
A route mapped with precision, a here to there
From what a grounded voice might advise
To feeling the burn. To late, it’s done
And only then does the mind churn
Poring over implications, consequences
Of actions already undertaken.

Was it worth it?
That new possession, that fast transgression
That moment of madness, did it teach a lesson?
Is anyone the wiser, richer, does the end come close
To justifying the scene that is now created?
Even now, events already put in train
An alternate history, a timeline selected,
Other options rejected, a sleeping dragon resurrected
Waking from the fathomless depths
And heading to the surface
Time will tell what from Pandora's box has been released
The moment subsides, a swallowing of pride
And a return to a land of the sane
Nothing to explain, but ever more the fear
of whether it will happen again.