Wallow

I wallow in the muck of self-induced calamity
Options never taken, they illustrate complicity
In choosing what is broken, I define a way to be
Choked with the unspoken, drunk on insobriety
Selecting the insensible, instead of sensibility
Outwardly reprehensible, an expectation set for me
Identifying with the consequence of actions
That satisfy no-one, but align with darker factions
Auto-stimulation through the lens of a reaction
Restless agitation, but can't stop the attraction
To getting a response, which covers up inaction
Burying the consequence of inward dissatisfaction
An urge to gratify, even if it leads to harm
No-one's standing by, nor sounding the alarm
Passing time itself is the ultimate endeavour
Wanting it to end, with no thought about whether
Time itself, is all that ever
Mattered in the end.

8 September 2021